How world events can have a ripple effect and impact many of us indirectly...
This week I have spoken to people that have been impacted both by the situation in Israel/Gaza and with the death of a teacher in a French school a couple of weeks ago. It has felt ‘a lot’ for many people, and situations like this can make us feel very vulnerable and powerless, and really quite scared. It can see us question the world into which we have chosen to raise our children.
The world is feeling quite ‘heavy’ at the moment and sometimes world events can trigger feelings in us as adults that are deep rooted in our own personal story or traumas (and remember trauma is not always created by a big life changing event, what is traumatic for one person can be very different for another).
When these trauma wounds are reactivated, we can be more ‘reactive’ to all sorts of things including our children’s behaviour.
Not only this, but if we as parents are feeling stressed, emotional, overwhelmed, unwell, then our children can pick up on this – and we know this, and we feel guilty (and parent guilt is the worst as we only ever want the best for our children and we never want to feel responsible for their suffering). This often creates a viscous cycle of one person’s emotions feeding off another. However please remember, this is a cycle that can be broken, with intention, and can become a powerful learning experience.
If you are feeling this way then please be compassionate with yourself, if you are being snappier than usual then remember you can use this as a moment to model repair with your child (or the other adult!) If you are feeling overwhelmed then please reach out for support.
Uncomfortable emotions are a necessary and important part of our journey as a human being, and can provide with huge opportunities for growth but they can be exhausting and so reaching out for help can be your biggest strength.
If you need to take a break from the media, and the constant exposure to what is going on in the world then allow yourself to do so. It does not mean that you don’t care about all those people that are suffering, it just means that you are taking care of yourself and your family so that you can better support each other, and in turn others in the wider world.
Take care, focus on the present and the little positives in your day.
P.S It is not just us as adults that are feeling the impact of world events. I was talking to a child the other day who told me that sometimes when they are trying to get to sleep they would worry about the war coming to their home. If you notice any changes in behaviour in your child (especially if they are of an age where they may understand a little of what is happening in the world) or if their sleep is more disrupted than usual, then maybe make sure that your child has a safe space, and time, in which to voice any worries that they have. A useful tool may be to have the book ‘A Huge Bag of Worries’ by Virginia Ironside to read together and open up a chat. xx